Eneko 🧉🌱 @SavageGarden@gulp.cafe

#introduction #introductions

In character as an Internet animal person, a lot of the time, I'm a yerba maned matewolf named Eneko, and I'm taller than you. Owing to the fact that I lack a root system, I'm left to pursue a more, ahem, carnal means for maintaining my thick, bushy, green mane and tail.

Eneko takes one of your paws in his and gives it a gentle squeeze before manipulating it in his digits. While locking his gaze to yours, he splays your own digits and plays with your paw before pressing it into the soft fur of his belly and releasing it, making its contents audibly slosh around.

He smiles at you, but it's obvious that he isn't putting everything into this interaction that he could.

As potential prey, what do you do?

My plantimals Eneko and Ilargus lack root systems. This allows them to move around and basically live like animals do.

They also photosynthesize, but this is only for energy. Worse, to photosynthesize, they need to be able to grow those structures that allow it: Leaves, stems, and so on.

Those structures require nutrients like potassium, calcium, nitrogen, carbon, and so on. Roots in soil normally transit those around, but there aren't any, so… how?

They eat meat and bone.

Every individual I pack away does more to lessen the per capita carbon footprint than any of those individuals would have been able to lessen it by themselves. More prey means more leaves for scrubbing the atmosphere of carbon dioxide!

Do your part to defend our natural resources. Slide down my gullet. :9

Eneko takes one of your paws in his and gives it a gentle squeeze before manipulating it in his digits. While locking his gaze to yours, he splays your own digits and plays with your paw before pressing it into the soft fur of his belly and releasing it, making its contents audibly slosh around.

He smiles at you, but it's obvious that he isn't putting everything into this interaction that he could.

As potential prey, what do you do?

This all said, before they've even managed to devour and trap prey, they turn the charisma knob up to 11 and release some pheromones that are extremely attractive.

They're so attractive, in fact, that most unwilling prey are enamored and turned willing, even eager.

Hunting is for chumps.

Once prey is trapped, the chemical attractants stop, and it's time to conserve energy for digestion, which usually involves taking a long nap someplace with a lot of UV.

This also changes the nature of their digestive systems; in particular, what goes down must come back up. After weeks to months, when digestion is finished, what is indigestible and non-nutritive is regurgitated.

For the most part, apropos organics, this is limited to parts containing keratin and chitin. Think fur, scales, and goat and ram horns.

Bone is long since history at that point.

Emptying deflates their bellies like balloons, and it's worth witnessing.

Despite their cutesy ivy and yerba mate exteriors, the boys are built on the inside more like pitcher plants. Instead of digestive organs made of smooth muscle, they have organs that are waxy and leafy.

Their organs also lack motility. If you put your ear to their bellies—at least, after their prey has gone to sleep—all you'll hear is the light sloshing of their pitcher contents.

Make sure to apply copious belly rubs when you take a listen. They like that.

My plantimals Eneko and Ilargus lack root systems. This allows them to move around and basically live like animals do.

They also photosynthesize, but this is only for energy. Worse, to photosynthesize, they need to be able to grow those structures that allow it: Leaves, stems, and so on.

Those structures require nutrients like potassium, calcium, nitrogen, carbon, and so on. Roots in soil normally transit those around, but there aren't any, so… how?

They eat meat and bone.

Gentle reminder from your friendly neighborhood eco-nommunist:

All Cops Are Breakfast.

Devour the 1%.

Out of character, I'm a site reliability engineer, likely for a big Internet company you've heard of. (If you've visited CNN.com in the last half-decade, you've hit code I've written.) I'm concerned with developer experience; I aim to make the right thing the easy thing.

I speak English with a strange combination of a California and Mid-South accent, but my accent in German is very Austrian.

I studied mathematics for six years in school, and I really want to go back to finish my PhD sometime.

I also have a couple of alts. Ilargus (he/him) is an ivy lynx (and actually my main), and Careto (*e/h*) is a maned ransomwarewolf. Eneko, like Ilargus, is also he/him.

Ref sheet forthcoming for Careto. *e's the newest out of the bunch—being prompted by the 2020 cyberpunk theme announced by multiple cons for this year—and I haven't yet hammered out h* design.

(Image credits: Eneko was drawn by FA:TheRoguez, and Ilargus was drawn by FA:oselotti.)

#introduction #introductions

In character as an Internet animal person, a lot of the time, I'm a yerba maned matewolf named Eneko, and I'm taller than you. Owing to the fact that I lack a root system, I'm left to pursue a more, ahem, carnal means for maintaining my thick, bushy, green mane and tail.

Oh, no. They let me on here. It's time to broadcast carnivorous plant thoughts, I guess!